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With deadlines looming closer, I've been toiling in the library doing research for my term papers. Admittedly, I don't have to write as many pages as previous semesters, but I am particularly concerned about one essay. You see I'm writing a paper about the U.S. Revolution (more specifically the Committees of Safety in the Chesapeake Bay area and their imposition of authority and establishment of legitimacy in years 1775-6). I have absolutely no background knowledge in U.S. history, so I'm going a little insane here. Oh well.
In my last update, I suggested that I actually enjoy receiving e-mails. But in order to RECEIVE e-mails, one does have to take the time to actually WRITE e-mails. "But...like...seriously, who has the...like...time for this?"
When you receive e-mails from friends do you seriously have the time to create a lengthy reply during exam time? Well, I was looking through my old humour files, and I found my standard e-mail form. What is it? Well you can use it to create a quick response letter! Why should you use it? Well...because you care about replying to your friends--besides they're worth the 2 seconds it takes to tab + arrow-key through my form!
Ok ok...so maybe this form isn't for everybody... Well, for more sample forms take a look here.
Ok, ok, ok.. I admit it.
I'm an e-mail whore.
I just love receiving e-mails. Over the course of a single week, I easily get over a hundred e-mails...so you can see why I get antsy if I don't check my e-mail for several days. Of course a lot of the e-mails I do receive are of the useless spam variety...but it's still fun to receive nonetheless. Most of the spam ranges from: "How to Succeed in Business" to "Increase the Size of Your Penis, Guaranteed" and "Get Viagra -- 10823", etc. Yeah I hear you saying: "these ads aren't that useless for you, Dave..." Yeah, shut up. Give me a couple more years before I need to pay attention to those Viagra ads, thank you very much.
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Possibly my future collection of cars? Read on to find out how... Photo copyright by http://www.kimble.org/ |
Most of the business venture e-mails usually start like this: "Look, we don't want you to waste your time, or ours..." When the first spams were written like this, I thought it was a clever piece of advertising writing. But now, everyone is using this line to start their e-mails. It's just old and stale. It seems like they're using the same form to write their e-mails. Can't they be more creative? Sigh.
Anyway I usually end up speed-deleting through most of the spam, until I see something of interest (like e-mails from friends, etc.). However, lately I have been getting personalized spam with tricky subject headings that get me to stop deleting, like: "Hi Dave--Big Business Opportunity Invest Now", "Dear Mr. Chun..."; The fact that these faceless vendors are now taking the extra time to place my name in the actual e-mail is heartwarming. I guess it's the thought that counts...
Anyway I did receive one personalized spam about a couple of months ago that was particularly intriguing. It was addressed from a district bank manager of an offshore bank (which will remain unnamed...). Anyway this bank manager claimed that he knew of an account at his bank that would expire soon, unless he transferred the money into a safe foreigner's account. Upon further research, the bank manager found that the original account holder had died nearly ten years ago. The original account holder has no next to kin, and due to the account's inactivity, the bank would expire the account in a short period. The amount unclaimed and left sitting in this account? A cool $26 million USD.
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Perhaps my future villa in Monaco? Read on to find out how... Photo copyright by http://www.kimble.org/ |
The bank manager was proposing that we transfer the money into a bank account in Canada, under my name (unbeknownst to superior officials at said bank). I would have to impersonate as a long acquaintance/family of the aforementioned account holder. For my part in this felony, I would receive a cool $9 million USD. Hmmm...
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Private parties with supermodels, and a private jet to fly us to remote tropical island? Tis possible...Photo copyright by http://www.kimble.org/ |
You know there is quite a lot I can do with $9 million dollars. US currency at that. At current exchange rates, that's almost $14 million Canadian. The bank manager agreed to handle all the paper work on his end and would fly out to Canada to split the money.
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Late night binges at Monte Carlo? Tis possible....Photo copyright by http://www.kimble.org/ |
Hmmm.... $14 million dollars. At last, I will be able afford all the camera lenses I desire! Kewl! With that kind of money, I could buy a Ferrari for each day of the week, and a villa in Monaco, and perhaps a couple bags of marshmallows! Yummy! Heck I could buy myself a yacht and have parties with supermodels, just like multi-millionaire Kim Schimtz! Of course, if things get too hot for me, I could probably fly out of Canada and live in South America in a non-extradition safe-haven. Hmmm...
Tempting is all I can say... But on the other hand, there is something to be said about taking a dead man's money. Besides, as much as I am tempted by $14 million dollars, I don't think I am quite prepared to commit international bank fraud at the tender age of 21.
But, a boy can dream, can't he?
Sigh.
I deleted the e-mail and went out and bought a lottery ticket instead.
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The past week and a half was kinda hectic for me...lots of work to do. Perhaps the most eventful part of the week was the earthquake in Seattle that measured about 6.8 on the Richter scale. You could feel the quake in Vancouver, although there wasn't any damage or injuries here, like in Seattle. I was sitting at home, listening to my Massive Attack's "Blue Lines" CD when all of a sudden, the house started to move. Literally.
At first, I thought the bass was on a little strong, but I quickly remembered that my subwoofer isn't that powerful. For the next second, I dismissed the shaking as merely a large train passing by. As the shaking continued and I finally realized it was an earthquake.
My brain quickly reacted: "Hmm...maybe this is the 'BIG' one...better hit the deck and get under the table or something." For years, scientists have been warning residents of Vancouver and Seattle that we are due for a huge earthquake--somewhere in the 8.0+ Richter scale range. They have told us that in the event of an earthquake, the safest thing to do is to stand in a doorway or get under a desk. The desk provides shelter from falling objects, while the flex of a doorframe would also provide some protection.
Supposedly.
My body, on the other hand, had other plans: "Get under the desk? Hmm...why bother? This chair is pretty damn comfy..."
By the time my body was convinced to move to a safer place, the shaking had already stopped. It was reassuring to know that my survival instincts are blindingly quick.
Sigh.
Actually, now that I think of it, in the event of a 8.0+ earthquake, I would probably get squashed by my desk. My computer desk already has 300 pounds of equipment on it--I'm quite sure it would break from stress and collapse on top of my body.
I walked outside, to query my mother: "Hey mom! Did you just feel that? I think that was an earthquake." She responded nonchanlantly: "Huh? An earthquake? Where?" Obviously she didn't feel it...
Anyway the electricity in my neighbourhood went out, while my phone lines went dead for about 20 minutes. Surprisingly my net connection was still alive... Nothing was damaged in my house, so all in all, I can say that I survived the first quake of the new millenium.
In other news, I switched web-servers about four days ago. I had signed a contract with my previous webhost for 100 MBs of space, but recently they changed the policy to only 50 MBs of space. I thought that was a little small, so I decided to change my web-host. My new host allows me to store up to 200 MBs of files, and seems a tad bit quicker than my previous host. My site went offline for a couple days while I was switching and copying files over to the new site.
Anyway 'nuff writing for today. Better get back to my other work...